By nature, man is very proud. We were not created to be this way. Our fallen state has fashioned us to be self-reliant, self-dependent and self-confident. Before Adam and Eve were expelled from the garden they were not toiling so as to be independent. They lived each day in dependence on what God provided for them (Gen. 1:29, 30). I would imagine that their main focus in life was on their time with God “in the cool of the day” and fellowship with each other; all the time exploring and marvelling the works of their Creator.
As sin increased, with the exception of a few men like Enoch, Noah, Abraham and some others—men who walked with God, man depended less on their Maker and more on himself and his ability. The tower of Babel is one such classic example (Gen. 11:4). Today, man has not only inherited this fallen nature but with crafty skill, built on it. His whole life is spent on making himself self-reliant, strong in himself and better with his capabilities. It is what we call ‘being independent’. From childhood we are ingrained with this teaching. It has become the very purpose of our existence. All our efforts are directed to storing “treasures upon the earth” even though we are fully conscious that we shall not have them forever.
Throughout scripture, we can see that God’s intent and direction has always pointed to making man trust Him. God has shown this over and over again; expressing this by way of practical teachings, commands and example. Today too the Lord tries to teach us this as He ordains all things in our lives—be it at our work place, with our money and several other aspects. The miracle of manna from heaven for the entire period the Israelites were in the desert is a typical example of this teaching. God, through this practical schooling sought to show that He was caring; He could be relied on and He never fails. Despite clear instructions to only gather what they needed, there were a few ‘unbelievers’ who could not take the chance. They needed to ensure that they were covered in case God failed.
The problem with man is that we just can’t risk throwing our all in complete—and I mean complete—trust in our Maker. Despite God proving His constant faithfulness; His deep care (remember how Jesus told us that our heavenly Father cares for us more than sparrows who do not sow or reap or gather into barns; or the lilies of the field that are here today and gone tomorrow?); His indescribable love (even while we were yet sinners)—I could go on with attribute after attribute that so explicitly demonstrates how much we mean to the Most High—we are still afraid to trust Him and rely on Him and cling to Him. We believe God to be capable but we think we are more dependable.
Throughout the centuries God has been working to wean His children—those who have believed in Him and His Son, Jesus Christ—away from themselves and closer to Him. His desire is that we who have been sealed with the promise of redemption can show forth to others that the God we serve is dependable and trustworthy.
Though I made the Lord Jesus my Saviour and Lord in 1983, it wasn’t until 2010 that I found God slowly working within me to wean me away from depending on myself and leaning more on Him. Through these past years I can testify of how faithfully He guided my steps. He first taught me to be content with what I had instead of seeking to satisfy my wants with loans and equal monthly installments. It was here that I put to practice the truth I believed. I was convinced that God knows my every need and cares for me beyond what I can imagine, so if I really need something, My Father will help me get it. I am a witness to the great grace of God; for though I was earlier steeped in loans, I saw how patiently and wisely God directed my decisions. He delivered me from it all.
God then taught me the importance of making His will, my will. The simultaneous working to make my behaviour such that the life of Christ can be seen in me has continued parallely, slowly and steadily. The journey has been hard and slow. Yet I can witness of God’s immense patience with me. He has never given up. I am reminded of a song that says, “He took six days to make the sun, moon and stars; but He’s still working on me.”
Looking back over these past seven years I can see how this weaning has made me less and less reliant on myself and my abilities; and more and more dependent on Him. It’s not the easiest place to be in. Those who have traversed this way and have submitted to God’s leading will testify that it’s not what we naturally want. Yet the more I surrendered, the more God revealed His glory; and the more meaningful and purposeful I have found my life.
A few days ago, I was reminded of the conversation that Jesus had with a rich, young ruler (Mt. 19:16-29). What our Lord said to that man has challenged all Christians down the ages. It is one of the hardest things I found to obey. I think we can all witness to how we have read this command of our Lord and moved on. Very, very few (only the Lord knows how many) have had the courage to take it on. Yet as I was reminded of this passage in Scripture, I was shown a deep truth that Jesus was trying to convey to us all. Consider two phrases our Saviour used. “Sell all” and “Give it to the poor”.
The first phrase spoke of giving up on our security, our strength and our ability. It causes us to “throw ourselves completely at the mercy” of God. I deliberately emphasise this phrase because though God is reliable, caring, kind, faithful and just; we find we have nothing of our own to rely on. All that we consider as our security to get us by in life—our salary, our savings, our capabilities to earn—is rendered insufficient. Such a situation pushes us to complete dependence on God. It also forces us to be patient and enduring. Through it, God teaches us what it means to wait in trust and hope (Psa. 27:13, 14).
The second phrase focuses on our attitude to what we have. Giving rather than keeping is another act of faith and dependence on God. In our giving, God ensures that we have no lack. Through these actions we testify that the One in whom we believe in is faithful and true. I think of what Paul wrote with regard to the purpose of our jobs. He said that we should do something useful with our own hands so that we might have something to share with those in need” (Eph. 4:28). But again, this too we find difficult. For after we have met our needs and covered all our bills, we still store the rest expecting to use it when a situation arises. It’s the same principle of unbelief that those who gathered extra manna displayed.
Then there is the aspect of being patient and willing to wait for God’s time. We are always keen on obtaining things when we want them; at our time. God has shown throughout scripture His command to remain steadfast in faith and patience. This is another act of dependence on God—being convinced that the God who cares for us is perfect in whatever He does. He knows exactly what to do and when to do it. Look at Noah or Abraham or Joseph or Moses or even our Lord Jesus. In each of these men of God, there was trust, perseverance and patience.
I have not sold my possessions but I can see how God has directed my decisions so that I have come to a place where I am almost completely weaned away from my own capability. There is hardly anything in me that I can rely on. What I have is completely insufficient compared to what I need. I have seen this kind of leading not just in me but in my wife and my children too. As individuals and as a family we find ourselves guided by the same hand with the same purpose. In ourselves we see weakness. In God we find hope and strength. For has He not said, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness” (2Cor. 12:9)? Our spirit now concurs with the Apostle Paul’s next statement, “Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me” (2Cor. 12:9).
We have much need to be strengthened in our inner man. For it is only through His power that we can be courageous and bold to trust Him in this manner. It requires God’s working to anchor us in His love. It requires His peace to still our hearts and know that He is God. Remember what Jesus told the disciples after the rich, young ruler walked away? They too were aghast at the figure of speech that the Lord used to show how difficult it was to enter heaven when we depend on ourselves. But He stressed that it was possible for He said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible” (Mt. 19:26). I am convinced that when we display this kind of total surrender, God is faithful to strengthen and encourage us. If this is what pleases Him, let us be committed and trusting to let Him lead us down this path. We will never have regrets. Of this our Lord made it clear when Peter said, “We have left everything to follow you! What then will there be for us” (Mt. 19:27)? Our Lord’s response was clear and emphatic. There is no safer place to be in than trusting God.
It is significant that the Saviour should continue on this subject after responding to Peter by saying, “Many who are first will be last; and the last first” (Mt. 19:30). For He goes on by narrating a parable to bring home that it’s our attitude that matters—one of devotion and love and keenness to be doing the will of the Father (Mt. 20:1-16). The Lord Jesus’ central theme in the entire discourse, both with the rich ruler and the disciples was just “one thing”—a heart that was completely devoted to God, holding back nothing. This was the one thing the young ruler, who kept every commandment from his youth, lacked (Lk. 18:22). This is what we lack.
I am conscious that what I have written is not something that we like reading. In fact I would understand if someone gave up midway while reading this. Nevertheless I have written what God has been teaching me and what I believe will profit the Church. May God reveal His truth to our hearts. May He give us a heart that is willing to submit to that truth and may He give strength to obey. Just as it is written, “It is God who is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure” (Php. 2:13).
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